"Im always wrong" complex?

I have a problem. I have discovered that I am a people pleaser, and like to take the easy way out. I find that I have no real idea who I am or what I like. I am so worried about offending people that I defer to their opinion because it seems more right than mine. If I try to defend myself, I immediately get hit with this sense that people telling me that im "wrong" and that its offensive to them. I am very much okay with many things, but when I am asked to debate, my morals and calm attitude get derailed by this horrific violent anger (plus the wrong complex). I can't have a normal debate with anyone because its too scary or its too offensive. This has started to affect a lot of my relationships and Im not quite sure what to do about it. It saddens me to see myself so irrational, and yet it seems out of my control.