Why is it that in today's political world we focus more on what we dont have in common than what we do?

i understand that it is important to debate issues that we dont agree on so we can find a common ground. but i have to say things have gotten way out of hand and has turned into some high school drama nonsense. everyone wants to blame the other side for the problems we have when it is both sides who have created these problems. certain problems are social problems not political ones and should not be on a political platform. i personally dont care about someones political affiliation as long as they are willing to put aside emotions for a minute and talk about these issues. we need to find common ground and we need to do it more sooner than later. if we cannot put aside our emotions to find this common ground then we might as well just say **** it and have a second civil war.